


I’ve Got A Bad Feeling About This

by stargatefan_archivist



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-31
Updated: 2013-12-31
Packaged: 2018-10-06 19:45:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10343274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stargatefan_archivist/pseuds/stargatefan_archivist
Summary: Jack and Daniel find themselves in a strangely familiar situation and use some not-so-common sense to get out of it





	

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Yuma, the archivist: this work was originally archived at [Stargatefan.com](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Stargatefan.com). To preserve the archive, we began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [StargateFan Archive Collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/StargateFan_Archive_Collection).

I've Got A Bad Feeling About This…

##  I've Got A Bad Feeling About This…

##### Written by Rae Ikarus   
Comments? Write to us at [mamabunny7@cs.com](mailto:mamabunny7@cs.com)

  * Jack and Daniel find themselves in a strangely familiar situation and use some not-so-common sense to get out of it 
  * G [Hu] 



* * *

"Jack…"

"Yes, Daniel."

"Have you ever seen that movie, 'Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade'?"

"Daniel, every normal person has seen every Indiana Jones movie at least ten times."

"Are you trying to say you've seen it?"

Jack rolled his eyes.

"Anyway, I was just trying to say that I'm having a severe case of déjà vu."

"Yeah, same here." Jack looked down at the strange rope squeezing his waist and then down at his ankles that were tied to the feet of the chair he was sitting on. "You don't happen to have a lighter in your back pocket do you?"

"No - even if I did, I don't think it would work on this cording. It's made of some strange synthetic material, perhaps of -"

"Never mind, Daniel." 

"You know, Jack…"

Jack let his head droop in despair.

"Indiana Jones was an archeologist."

Jack shot his head back up. "No he wasn't," he scoffed, "That was his dad, Dr. Jones."

"How many times have you seen those movies?"

"So I haven't watched that one in a while. I still think you're wrong."

"Actually, Jack, that particular one points out the fact that he's a professor of archeology, when it shows him lecturing at the university."

"University? What university?"

"I thought you said you'd watched that movie ten times."

"I have! I just… usually… don't pay much attention to the beginning. Sure, the part where he's running over the train and when he gets his hat. That's cool. After that it gets a little boring."

"Boring? It's not boring. It's very interesting. I especially like it when he goes to Donovan's house and they discuss the legend of the holy grail and the crusades. Very fascinating. And after all the things we've seen, I -"

"Is he really an archeologist?"

"Yes, Jack."

"Not his dad?"

"Yes, his dad's an archeologist too. And they're both doctors."

"Okay, okay, whatever. What's your point?"

"Since you've watched the movie at least ten times, you must think Indiana Jones is a really 'cool' guy."

"Yeah, so? …wait a minute. I think I see where this is going. Okay, so he's an archeologist, big deal. I relate to him more than you do."

"Oh? How?"

"He's a military-minded man. Cracks his bull whip with the best of them. I really don't see you having a fist fight with Nazis on top of a canon speeding through the desert."

"Frankly, I don't see you doing that either. Besides, he lost that fist fight, remember?"

"Whatever. Besides, you relate more to-" Jack stopped short.

"To who? His dad?"

"Well, I always sort of compared you to Brody."

"Marcus? I don't think so, Jack. Marcus was always getting into trouble and he was too excitable."

Jack cleared his throat. "Uh, yeah."

"Okay, okay, so I'm not always 'there'. But I do know as many languages as Indiana Jones told Donovan that Marcus knew, that he didn't, really."

"You know, though, Danny, you could be compared to Jones Senior. After all, when he practically gave Indy a concussion with that jar -"

"It was actually a ceramic pot, Jack."

"Yeah, well, when he did that, he was more worried about the jar, er, pot, than he was about Indy."

"I would never do that!"

"No, I was thinking with me in Indy's shoes."

"Oh."

Jack peered behind him, in Daniel's direction, and changed the subject. "Well, what are we going to do about our situation?"

"We could wait till they come back and accept our fate."

"Oh, that's a great suggestion. What about Sam and Teal'c? Are we just going to leave them out in the cold?"

"No, I don't guess that would be a very good idea. We could try burning the rope - or whatever this stuff is."

"With what?"

"I have a match in this pocket right here. I think I can reach it."

"I thought you didn't think it would work."

"I don't."

"I'm not sure I'm comfortable with that."

"With me not thinking it will work?"

"No, with you holding a match."

Daniel sighed.

"Do you remember if they tied the chairs together?" Jack said.

"They did - with us."

"No, no. I remember wondering why they didn't just try to slip off their chairs in the movie and realized it was because the Nazis had actually tied the two chairs together at the back."

"I don't remember. Besides, if you're like me over here, our ankles are tied to the chairs… wait a minute."

"If we can get the chairs out from under us -"

"Then we can slip our feet off too!"

"Daniel, this is scary. You've been hanging around me too long and getting too smart."

"Yeah, right," Daniel muttered.

"So, shall we try it?"

"Okay… how? I'm finding it very difficult to move."

"I hate to suggest it, but this calls for desperate measures. Did you ever have a circus when you were a kid?"

"A circus?"

"Yeah, sure, a circus. Me and my pals would put on a circus in the summer, especially since little Sally Sanders… well, anyway, we put on a circus. We'd play with balls and bowling pins and - chairs."

"Oh, no, Jack, you aren't serious… you can't be serious…"

"Ohh, I'm very serious. Hang on, Danny-boy."

"Ohh, boooy…!" he stammered.

"Whoa! Man are you heavy! Come on, hurry up! Pull your feet off the chair before I kill us both!"

"Uhhh… Jack… I really… don't like… heights!"

Jack groaned. "You're not going to be liking much of anything if you don't suck it up and get moving!"

"Okay, okay, okay! They're off, they're off! Put me DOWN!"

THUD!

"Now, do you think you can…"

"No, Jack."

"Are you sure you can't…"

"No, Jack."

"Well, okay then, we're going to have to do this the hard way."

"Believe me, whatever way that is, it's not as hard as the other way."

"Oh, come on! I'm not THAT big!"

"Okay, I'll try. But I don't think it will… wooork! Jack, give me a little warning why don't you?!"

"Wow, you're a lot stronger than 'ya thought, huh? Sorry about that, I should've told you I was going to lean back. Whoa, watch out for that table! Come on, get your balance, I've almost got these things off."

THUD!

"Okay, Jack, now what?"

"Okay, grab my hands."

"Jack, are you serious?"

"Yes, Daniel, I'm absolutely serious. Okay, gotcha. Now put the heels of your feet on the edge of your seat."

Daniel chuckled. "We probably look ridiculous."

"I won't tell if you won't."

Just then the doors of the room flew open and crashed against the wall. Two figures came stumbling in, dripping wet, and panting.

Jack and Daniel jerked their heads toward the sound as Teal'c and Sam clambered over to them, Sam nearly doubled over with laughter. "What in the world are you guys doing?" she giggled.

Daniel looked down at his toes perched on the edge of his chair and bit his bottom lip.

"We're trying to ESCAPE, Major, if you don't MIND, to come and SAVE you!" Jack said angrily.

Sam tried to compose herself. "Sorry, sir."

"I, in fact, am also finding it difficult to remain solemn in manner," Teal'c added, smiling faintly.

"Oh, just help us out of here!" Jack said.

Sam and Teal'c cut the rope with a knife they found on a table and helped the Colonel and the archeologist back on their feet again.

"So how did everything go?" asked Daniel.

"Oh, we beat the bad guys, saved the world, nothing new," Sam answered, smiling at Jack. 

"We are indeed out of danger," said Teal'c.

"I guess Sam and Teal'c get to be the heroes, today, Jack."

"Yeah. I think they deserve dinner and a movie when we get back to home base, don't you? Teal'c, have you ever heard of Indiana Jones? Great guy. Made some terrific movies…" Jack said as they walked out.

**The End**

  


* * *

  


> I love the Indiana Jones movies, particularly "The Last Crusade". Indy's my hero. And I just knew that Jack would have to be a big Indy fan too. But I also knew that Indy's an archeologist, and we all know what Jack thinks about archeologists...

* * *

>   
> © August 11, 2001 The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp.  
> The Stargate, SG-I, the Goa'uld and all other characters  
> who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the names,   
> titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television,   
> Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd.   
> Partnership.  
> This fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and   
> solely meant for entertainment.   
> All other characters, the story idea and the story itself   
> are the sole property of the author.   
> 

* * *

  



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